What to Do If You Touch Poison Hemlock
This part blew my mind. And you don’t even have to eat it to be in trouble.
Brushing against Poison Hemlock doesn’t usually kill you (fortunately), but it will definitely make you wish you stayed at home. Think along the lines of poison ivy, but more intense. For others, it can cause serious skin irritation, rashes or blisters. Others might incidentally rub their eyes or perhaps their mouth afterward, and that’s where things can get bad—because the toxic alkaloids can be absorbed through mucous membranes.
So, think of rubbing against it while posing for a selfie in the wildflowers (let’s be real: We’ve all done that), and then wiping sweat from your brow. Boom. Instant regret.
How to Distinguish Poison Hemlock (So You Don’t Hug It)
Now here’s the part you need to burn into your brain: i.d.
Because, as I mentioned, it’s really pretty. And it bears a close resemblance to other innocent plants like Queen Anne’s lace or even wild parsley. But here’s the cheat sheet:
Height: Typically 6–10 feet when growing to maturity.
Flowers: Small white flowers in umbels.
Leaves: Ferny, lacy and bright green. They stink — like a musty mouse cage if you crush them.
Stem: The giveaway feature. It is green dappled with purplish blotches or streaks. Not solid purple—blotchy. That’s your red flag.
Seriously, those purple splotches are the biohazard sign of the plant world. If you see them, don’t touch. Don’t sniff. Back up. Back away slowly like you’re in a horror movie and you just heard a twig snap.
